03.26.09
Reflecting a Bit on the Circle of Life
Last weekend I attended the wake and then the funeral service of one of my uncles. Actually he wasn’t really a blood relative, but close enough to the family that we called him uncle. He was the father of two of my regular blood donors during my transfusion dependent days. His passing has left me contemplative. He had three sons and one daughter. I found it interesting to see how differently each child handled their father’s passing. They all loved him, but they all managed their emotions somewhat differently.
I hadn’t originally wanted to write about funerals or the passing of friends and relatives. But for some reason, even though I have quite a bit of things I think are bloggable, I keep returning to the passing of my uncle. And then also the fairly recent news of the passing of another person I had become acquainted with online has made me reflect more on life and the lives of others. He actually passed away the same weekend my uncle did. I’m not really sure “what” I want to say, but somehow I keep coming back to this. So I thought perhaps I should just get it off of my shoulders, and maybe I’ll feel back to normal about normal blogging things.
My uncle and this other friend of mine appeared quite opposite in respect to religion. My uncle and his family (minus one of his children) seemed to be very Catholic and that was really reflected during his wake and his funeral service. They held a rosary service during the wake which consisted of many, many repeats of various prayers and prayers to all sorts of saints that I haven’t even heard of. Then on the other hand my other friend was a professed atheist. Well, “maybe” he was really an agnostic, but for the most part he was not interested in any sort of religion or anyone trying to “convert” him even though he knew there was a real chance that he didn’t have long to live due to his lung cancer.
Both of these men were somewhat the same age. One was in his 50s and the other in his 60s. Both men were born and reared on islands. One in a warm island, the Philippines, while the other on a very cold island, the Isle of Man. I think of all the people who have come and gone before us. I think of how all our lives interconnect. We seem to drift in and out of each others’ lives. How different, yet the same we all live. There are those who have lived long lives and those who have only briefly lived in this world. And how time flies! It seems not long ago I was just a kid, now I have kids of my own and my once robust parents are aging and frail. My kids are also coming of age that they soon can be parents of their own. What determines our fates? Where are those who have passed now? And will we meet again?
During our recent trip to the Philippines I was able to visit both of our family plots (one from my father’s side of the family, and the one on my mother’s side of the family). And for the first time I was able to see the grave stone of my oldest sister, Marinella, who died shortly after her birth. I believe in life after death. And I believe that one day I will be able to see my sister herself for the first time, too. As Eric Clapton sang to his son, and my uncle’s children sang to their father at his funeral who had suffered about 12 years of Alzheimer’s, I wonder, “Will you know my name, if I saw you in heaven?”
Marlakins
